Now and then, you may find yourself sucked into a bad habit of comparing yourself to others. You’ll look at people’s jobs, their fancy Instagram posts, and their celebratory success posts on Facebook. You catch yourself thinking, “Why am I not doing that?” Then, just as quickly as you thought it, you remember that you don't even want to do what they're doing.
You’re not alone in having moments like these when you fall into the comparison trap. It’s easy to do when everywhere you look, people tell you about their latest success or exciting adventure. It's like you're constantly being teased to do something else. This is one of the dangers of social media. You have to constantly remind yourself to approach it with a bit of perspective. You have to stop comparing yourself to others and start focusing on your own path.
The trick is to become more aware of when you’re making these comparisons—and acknowledging them. Suppressing them or beating yourself up for making comparisons will only make it worse. Once you've acknowledged that this is something that you're doing, it's time to try these five strategies:
You are exactly who you are meant to be. No one on this planet has ever been exactly like you, and no one in the future will ever be exactly like you. Don't let anyone else make you think otherwise. Don't get tempted by who other people are, or how you think you'd like to be more like them. Focus on who you are, because no one in the entire world can do a better job of being you than you. Connect with yourself and love yourself—that's when the magic happens.
Often, we try to push ourselves to places where we’re not quite ready to be. The universe knows exactly what you can handle, and your intuition subconsciously tells you that, too. Trust that. Don't think about where you aren't yet or what you haven't achieved yet. Become mindful of where you are right now and appreciate every bit of it.
The clearer you are about where you want to go, the easier it is to let go of comparisons. You'll be less affected by other people's tempting success stories because you'll know what they're doing is not a part of the vision you have for yourself. You'll see their successes, celebrate them with them, and remind yourself of the next milestone you're looking to reach in your life. Not their milestone. Your milestone.
Social media makes social comparisons dangerously easy, and if you're feeling particularly stressed, tired, or low, you'll be even more vulnerable to making these comparisons in a bad way. Remind yourself that social media shows a very limited view of what’s going on in people’s lives—not their challenges but their successes, not their frustrations but their aspirations. Don't fall into the trap of thinking their lives are perfect and that you're doing something wrong because you haven't got a hundred posts about your latest successes on your social media profile.
Having people to look up to is amazing. But sometimes you forget how long and hard they've worked to get there. Remind yourself of where you are in your journey and you'll get a big fat reality check. Get inspired by your mentors, coaches, and the places you aspire to get to—but focus your energy on getting yourself simply from Chapter One to Chapter Two. And when you do, celebrate the hell out of it.
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