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Mort LaitnerThe Times of Israel (Blogs) |
Yamakopter, manufacture of the novelty kippah with a spinning propeller ($17.49) has dissolved its contractual relationship with Kanye West. ...
When Benjamin Netanyahu, Israel’s former and future Prime Minister, called former US President Donald Trump’s evening soiree with Kanye West and...
This article, “Trump Breaks Bread with America’s Number One Anti-Semite and Holocaust Denier—Republican Silence Is Almost Deafening,” first...
Entering my mom’s Boca condo, I snuck over to the living room end table, picked up the remote and changed the channel from Fox to CNN. Since Mom...
“Moshe, how are you feeling this morning?” Even before I asked, I knew Moshe would complain about his back pain. He’d say, “It hurts when I...
On November 9, 2022, I was fortunate enough to be assigned by Gentlemen’s Quarterly (GQ) to interview Kanye West. Yes, that publication that focuses...
As a twelve-year-old, my mom drove my four-year-old sister, Barbara, and I to the town of Monticello. I rode in the backseat of Mom’s spanking...
Manhattan Beach, California Skechers’ Corporate Headquarters October 26, 2022 Secretary: Sir, Kayne West is in our outer office. He...
Kanye, I’m bit sleepy tonite but when I wake up, yo and I gonna fight Yo be Death Con 3 threatening the JEWISH PEOPLE Now we gonna...
“Good morning Moshe, have I got a story for you,” Mordechai bellowed. Moshe upon hearing Mordechai’s voice, put down his scooped, double...
O Lord, let them remember the taste of liberty won by their relatives on bloody fields of Gettysburg O Lord, let them recall when they stood up...
My eyes studied the photograph with great curiosity. “Why’s that photo different?””It just has two smiling, anti-Semitic bastards...
Dear G‑d, I am sorry for the sin I did in Your presence by not donating more funds in support of democracy, liberty and freedom. Dear G-d, I am...
Dateline: Tallahassee, Florida—September 27, 2022 From the pages of the Miami Herald At a press conference held at the governor’s mansion,...
I watched as the narcissist waved to his crowd of supporters at one of his Midwestern rallies. I crinkled my eyes, furrowed my brow and thought, “I...
Way back in 2009, I started my career as an author. I wrote and published short stories for the Miami-Dade County Health Department’s tome,...
Mordechai took a seat in the Tel Avi cafe, greeted his friend with a pat on the back and ordered an espresso. “Moshe my friend, I got a existential...
You stupid piece of crap, I can’t believe you’re my cellmate. You’re one of those insurrectionists that charged and invaded the Capitol...
Thursday, November 21, 2024 6:00 a.m. After a sleepless night, I stood in the darkness, double locking my front door. I stretched,...
Author, Rita Dorn, asks her readers in “Monica’s Chanukah, & More” to write a Chanukah poem. Rita’s book even gives the kids a blank page to...
Wednesday, November 6, 2024 — One day after the presidential election I sat in front of my desktop with my eyes fixated on the screen. My...
We find ourselves noshing in the same kosher pizzeria where Nachman Mostofsky took Marjorie Taylor Greene on her tour of Jewish neighborhoods in...
TOP SECRET—FOR YOUR EYES ONLY It has come to my attention that approximately 100 Neo-Nazis presented themselves waving anti-Semitic signs and Nazi...
Turn up the music, turn down the lights I got a feelin’ I’m gon’ be alright Okay (okay), alright It’s about damn time (time) Turn up the...
December 20, 2025 Eleven months after the President’s Inauguration. Six months after his declaration of martial law. I listened to the...
For years, many of my readers have requested an audio version of my short story “The Last Jew of Vinnitsa”. Well, here it is. The story is read...
“So we raided the joint. We went over there and grabbed everything insight, all their bullshit signs, and smacked the shit out of them, broke them...
I’m relaxing in my black leather chair, with my feet on my desk, intently listening to my favorite harmonic player, Lois Gilbert. She’s playing a...
I love idioms. And one of my favorites idioms is, “Truth is stranger than fiction.” I fancy reading weird stories, waving my index finger in the...
Andy Tran is Asian. His fiancée is white. And they own two dogs. (Please don’t ask me the dog’s breeds or names. I don’t know them. But I...
My five-year-old grandson, Carson, and I are aboard the Disney “Dream.” Yes, we’re on the floating magic kingdom. Cruising to the Bahamas...
Convicted felon, Timothy Hale-Cusanelli, now faces up to 20 years in prison for his role in the January 6th insurrection. You know Timothy...
I open my e-mail to find a YouTube posting from my friend, Lois Gilbert. Attached in the e-mail is Lois’ harmonica rendition of ‘Sunrise...
I’m standing next to the counter in my post office, staring at a sheet of stamps that are tacked to the wall. On the stamps, I see a cartoon of a...
I read Woody—The Biography by David Evanier (St. Martin’s Press—New York 2015) and I came across this interesting dialogue on page 20, from one...
Dear Mort, So sorry to hear that you got COVID. Praying for your speedy recovery. So to help your recovery, I am enclosing two...
Dear Marjorie, You evil cunning linguist. You queen of malapropism. You win. I’m now infected with COVID because of your...
“Hey boychick, take a guess on what’s my topic for this year’s Passover speech?” “Mort, I really don’t feel like guessing but I’m...
I sit in one of the cruise ship’s dining rooms, gazing through its floor-to-ceiling windows. The sea is calm; I’m famished. My gut yells,...
“Boychick, did ya know that one of my favorite sayings is: ‘Now, I’ve heard it all?'” “Yup, I knew that.” “And did ya know that a week...
“Hey boychick, ya know what movie I rented On Demand last night?” I nodded my head in exasperation. “No Mort, what movie did ya watch?” ...
“Boubileh, isn’t it amazing that Naftali Bennett, the prime minister of Israel, is mediating the war between Ukraine and Russian.” “Yup.” ...
It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of joy and peace, it was the age of war and tyranny, it was an era of contagion at...
Marjorie, for over a year, I have written many satirical stories about your propensity to say and do incredibly mean and stupid stuff. But today,...
“Bill, ya know what documentary I watched last night?” “No Mort, what show did you watch?” “Well, when I took breaks from the Russia’s...
“Congresswomen Taylor, it’s good to see you again. Last time I interviewed you was after your Jewish laser beam fiasco. I recall you made that...
A little over a month ago, I wrote, “We have no idea how crazy the next so-called educator will behave…” when it comes to raising the...
After Whoopi Goldberg was suspended for two weeks by ABC execs from the show, “The View” for claiming on air that the Holocaust was “not about...
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