You’ve just had a crummy day, and you wish you hadn’t. Your first instinct is to pick up the phone, call your best friend, and complain.

But you also know deep down that you want to be more positive. You know that complaining emphasizes the negative in your life, and you’d like to create a shift for yourself.

You recall that you started a gratitude journal, and when you use it, you find you really enjoy noticing the good things more than the bad.

Yet your bad day keeps replaying in your head. This makes you feel reluctant, defeated, and unmotivated. In fact, it makes you want to ditch the gratitude practice altogether.

What should you do?

Current science says that while it’s fine to call your friend for support, if you only harp on the negatives, failing to rethink your own cognitive distortions, you’ll probably just continue to feel bad.

Though a great friend can help you co-regulate, and you’ll feel better........

© Psychology Today