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A rusting car resting on blocks in a front yard choked with weeds. A mangy flea-ridden dog lurking menacingly on the porch. A leaning letterbox stuffed with final demands. A TV blasting at full volume, but never loud enough to smother the frustrated cries behind those thin walls and frayed curtains.
Houses of despair like this exist in many neighbourhoods. But not all boast such squalid exteriors.
One in Canberra, an architectural wonder, springs to mind. Set on a sprawling 240,000 square metres, its entrance is paved in granite, its facade clad in Italian marble. A floor of black limestone imported from Belgium brims with 350-million-year-old fossils. And those timber walls! White birch, brush box and jarrah. Such attention to detail.
The place reeks of quality. But something wretched and rotten lies within.
It's been almost two years since Anthony Albanese promised to give Parliament House a decent scrub and restore it to its originally intended grandeur - a place of ambition and ideas, of decency and courtesy.
"It starts with giving people respect," Albanese trumpeted. "I want to see parliamentary processes operate properly. I want to see question time ... occur without seeing the significant disruption that we've seen."
So much for that renovation. A house that should rise above all others has continued to remain nothing more than a national embarrassment.
Since Albanese came to power there have been 118 MPs kicked out of question time, only 11 fewer than in the Morrison government's first 18 months.
We've seen a former deputy prime minister mix alcohol and prescription drugs and end up sprawled on a pavement, close to the gutter where much of our politics is practised. We've winced at a high-ranking senator slurring her words during a parliamentary hearing. And allegations of harassment and bullying continue, amid daily acts of duplicity and self-interest.
And yet, when an opportunity finally arrives to impose the sort of behavioural standards demanded in most of the nation's workplaces, the Independent Parliamentary Standards Commission - recommended back in 2021 to rein in the worst excesses of our federal MPs - now appears unlikely to be up and running until late this year.
It will be lucky to be fully operational by the time the next election rolls around.
You might have thought this latest crop of political miscreants would have welcomed the chance to clean up their act. After all, they're always decrying the falling levels of public trust in institutions and the rising cynicism about politics.
But according to the Minister for Women, Katy Gallagher, MPs are divided about whether the commission should have powers to sanction and even suspend politicians without pay.
"Because this is a politically charged environment, it is different from a lot of workplaces," Gallagher said.
Really? Is there a workplace in this nation that doesn't boast a politically charged environment? "I think people are naturally cautious about setting up systems where people can be brought before it and punished," Gallagher recently observed.
The hide of these people. Swaddled in the self-entitlement that comes with plush digs, 15.4 per cent superannuation packages and chauffeured cars (about two-thirds of our federal MPs own two or more properties) our politicians still, unbelievably, fail to comprehend the level of disgust and disregard in which they are held by the public.
Lacking a spine has never been an impediment to a political career, of course. But we tend to underestimate the power of gutlessness, too. Neither Albanese nor Peter Dutton have offered any real leadership on the proposed new standards commission, presumably for fear of offending colleagues and disrupting parliament's clubby atmosphere.
This week both men also quickly shut down suggestions that politicians be subjected to alcohol and drug testing, a common enough practice in workplaces demanding steely focus and concentration, but apparently an unnecessary one for those responsible for drafting the laws of this country and overseeing its military arsenal.
Albanese and Dutton should spend more time contemplating one of Parliament House's most majestic features. The Member's Hall lies at the very centre of the grandest house in the country. Below its rounded timber columns rests the Reflective Pool, set on a single eight-tonne slab of Black Imperial granite.
The pool's flowing waters were engineered to muffle the sounds of any conversation, the perfect place to reflect on the reputational damage this current mob of squatters continues inflicting on the joint.
Perhaps there, beside those tranquil waters, it might finally dawn on Albanese and Dutton that their house needs urgent repairs. Otherwise it will remain condemned by a rightly fed-up nation.
HAVE YOUR SAY: Should the new Parliamentary Standards Commission have the power to suspend MPs without pay? Should parliamentarians be subjected to random alcohol and drug testing? Do you believe the Albanese government has improved the quality of political debate? Email us: echidna@theechidna.com.au
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IN CASE YOU MISSED IT:
- Former Catholic bishop of Broome, Christopher Saunders, has been charged over historical child sex abuse allegations. The 74-year-old is scheduled to face Broome Magistrates Court on Thursday. He was charged with 19 offences after Western Australian police arrested him at his home in the popular holiday town on Wednesday.
- Qantas says lower fares contributed to a 13 per cent drop in underlying profit for the half-year as it revealed new cabin interiors for Qantaslink planes and plans for fast, free WiFi on international flights as it tries to win back customer trust.
- Rural and regional areas have not had adequate attention paid to their bus services despite their importance to local communities, serving millions of passengers each year. A report from the NSW government's Bus Industry Taskforce released on Thursday recommends identifying fresh options to improve contract arrangements outside major cities.
THEY SAID IT: "Distrust of government isn't baseless cynicism. It's realism." - Ben Shapiro
YOU SAID IT: We deny ourselves so much when we cast a cloak of invisibility over the older members of our community.
Louise writes: "Feel very sad the way many of our older Aussie men and women are treated today by society. As one of them - 33,580 days old, fifth generation and still hale and hearty - I can still contribute. Many, much younger than myself, have lost hope and are regarded as invisible. People should remember they are here because of the older generations, and all generations who have gone before them, and show respect. Brings to mind Bob Hawke calling an elderly gentleman a 'silly old bugger' and he ended up one."
Larissa takes issue, citing this earlier Echidna column, which lamented the way Boomers are so readily blamed for all that's wrong in the world: "It seemed fine for you to use ageism then, and in your other editions, to make assumptions about a whole generation! You wonder why slurs and ageism occurs when you feel slighted but you have used it in equal measure. The cognitive dissonance needs to be called out."
Stuart has some advice: "I'm 78 and I don't wait for someone else to engage. In Bunnings a total stranger wheeling a cart with a dog in will be asked what aisle are the dogs in. Same for babies. Just two examples. So for my fellow OWBs, start the conversation! You possess a wealth of knowledge, gathered over a lifetime. You might not always get a response but you will most of the time."
Tony writes: "Invisible? That's me. I'm 72 and have a slight disability that means I walk with a stick. The number of times I'm pushed over in the supermarket is amazing. People, especially middle aged women, just don't see me and push me away. On two occasions I have actually fallen. A mumbled 'sorry' from the person who pushed me. Mostly it's young people who help me up. Yes, we do tend to lump groups of people in together. At the moment I'm particularly lonely because my wife is in hospital with a broken ankle. That means neither of us will be able to drive which will enhance our loneliness. Maybe we should move to The Netherlands!"
"We may be invisible but what the kiddy cohort really hates is our wealth," writes Kim. "We're rich, baby. And they're not."
Bill writes: "I have a theory on ageism. I think it its related to the envy many young people feel that baby boomers had it easy, and should pass on their wealth now, without it being earned. Employers tell me that 25-35-year-olds have a huge sense of entitlement, think that an arts degree is a substitute for work, and life experience. Ooops, time for my tablets."
"I am one of the lucky ones," writes Monica. "I live in an over-55s retirement complex along with a few other 'old gals'. Some of us belong to the local RSL where we are treated very well. Most of us have a very active social life, we have our doctors, church, shopping, etc, close by. We live close to public transport and I cannot praise our bus drivers (and younger passengers) highly enough. I think attitude has a lot to do with the way we are treated and I find that a bright smile and a happy attitude make a big difference."
Old Donald writes: "I'm so pleased to see John Prine's Hello in There in print. I have spruiked it for years: I first heard it sung by Reg Livermore quite wonderfully in Betty Blockbuster Follies at the old Balmain Bijou; then some years later bought Bette Midler's version on a superb CD. Backing my memory, let me add another few lines: 'We lost Davy in the Korean War... still don't know what for... it don't matter any more...' So thank you reviving memory of this magnificent and lucid statement of a human disillusionment that should never be allowed to happen."
"Society has always regarded women no longer of child-bearing age as redundant," writes Deb. "Men tend to be much older when joining the redundant ranks. And even then there are people, probably women, who make the men feel important and relevant by listening to their stories, opinions etc. Redundant women are more likely to be totally ignored."
Garry Linnell is one of Australia’s most experienced journalists. He has won several awards for his writing, including a Walkley for best feature writing. He writes a weekly column for ACM and the Echidna.
Garry Linnell is one of Australia’s most experienced journalists. He has won several awards for his writing, including a Walkley for best feature writing. He writes a weekly column for ACM and the Echidna.
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