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Moreen Simpson: Unreliable Aberdeen buses are leaving passengers in the dark – and the baking sun

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Plottin’ did ye say? I’ll never utter the words “tsaffa cal’” again.

My heart goes out to those poor Queen’s Guardsmen outside Buckingham Palace and Downing Street, plootered under the stifling weight of those wretched bearskins. I near grat when I saw one of the forbidden-to-move soldiers, sweat poorin’ doon his face, being fed a drink.

Why in the name of all that’s merciful are they not in lighter uniforms, bearskins binned? Who needs a foreign foe when the top brass can be torturers?

I’ve been trying to follow instructions about how to keep the house cool, opening windows front and back. But really, really daren’t keep my bedroom window open overnight. I’ve this dread of some animal loupin’ in and on to my bed. Giz me the heebies just thinkin’ aboot it.

I hear you scraik: “Dinna be such a coordie,........

© Evening Express

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