Dante’s Beach, Ravenna

In my life I have nearly killed myself mainly with cigarettes and alcohol and dangerous journeys into the night. I have experienced what awaits you in those places but it is not the sort of thing you can easily talk about or even put into words. It is perhaps too secret. I am also usually skint, so all in all I do not exactly fit the bill as a solid and reliable father figure who commands respect. Yet I have six children, aged nine to 21, who live with me and their Italian mother, Carla, and I try to do my best.

We have been talking about whether we would allow two of our daughters Magdalena (16) and Rita (15) to travel round Europe alone for a month on Interrail tickets. The matter came up after the recent hoo-ha when Kirstie Allsopp, who is famous and sounds like fun, revealed on Twitter that her nearly 16-year-old son had just finished a three- week Interrail tour of Europe with a friend who is actually 16.

There was outrage among those who want to cling-film life. Someone reported her for ‘child neglect’ to social services, who somehow got hold of her phone number and left her a text message. ‘I’m wanting to have a conversation with you regarding a referral we have received in relation to your son. Kind regards,’ it said.

In a fury, she rang their number but........

© The Spectator