It’s lovely going out for dinner in London. It’s a gastro capital with cuisines from all around the world. One night, Indian, French the next, Peruvian, Ethiopian. You can travel the globe without leaving Hackney.

This time of year, I’m super busy planning the un-Royal Variety show – a punk pastiche of the royal version – and so I can’t be bothered with meal prep and washing up, and find myself eating out an awful lot. Most food trends I can get behind (with the exception of truffle – yuck!). But one pernicious dining trend that refuses to go away and which I detest is “small plates”.

My heart sinks and I become inwardly furious when I sit down and the waiter........

© The Guardian