I have frequently felt robbed at the pub. You know the feeling. Tapping your card on the reader and seeing £6.70 drain from your bank account in exchange for the most average glass of IPA in the world; doing it again, a third, maybe even a fourth time, shuddering internally. News last week, however, confirmed the worst: actually, you really have been getting robbed at the pub.

Last week, the Chartered Trading Standards Institute published a study of drinks served at 77 pubs and bars around the UK. They found that, out of 137 orders of pints, half pints and 175ml glasses of wine, about 70% contained less drink than they were supposed to; 29% of these short measures were under by 5% or more. Beer was where there were the most discrepancies: 86% of orders were short-measured. For the average beer drinker, these losses add up to £88.40 a year of beer paid for and never actually served.

There is, I can’t deny, something funny about the notion of clandestine agents roving the country’s drinking houses and measuring their pours down to the millilitre. But let’s take these findings seriously. Let us imagine that this is, in fact, one of the most pressing issues facing consumers. And let........

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