As a new Daily Beast contributor, I think it’s important to be as honest with you guys up front as I possibly can be, and so I begin my first column with a confession: I own a Tesla. Worse, I absolutely love it.

I’m sorry. I am so, so, sorry.

In fairness, I bought the car back in 2018, back in the days when it wasn’t yet abundantly clear that Elon Musk is a massive tool. My son, then a teenager, tried to warn that Musk was a “douche,” but I wouldn’t listen. And now I’m stuck driving around in the best damned car I’ve ever purchased. Mea culpa.

Musk is in the news again, this time for conducting the first clinical trial of his Neuralink implants into a human brain. The chip will (supposedly) allow those suffering from spinal injuries or other conditions to use their minds to manipulate objects.

It’s a laudable goal from a guy in need of some decent PR after a disastrous few years in which he managed to alienate nearly everybody outside of the incel groyper set.

From endorsing the Great Replacement Theory to briefly reinstating Kanye West on his social media site during the heyday of his antisemitic psychic break, to telling the head of........

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