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Here’s the number one thing I do to feel worthy

A friend cancelled our plans. They were injured. They were okay, but they needed to rest. In that moment, I wanted to feel compassion for them. Of course they should take care of themselves; they’ve been in an accident!

However, if I’m being honest, compassion wasn't the first thing I felt. First, I felt rejected. This was a friendship I had been intentional about cultivating for months, and I craved more reciprocity. I had even asked them to initiate more. Part of me took this cancellation not as a sign of care for themselves, but as rejection of me.

What do we do with these feelings we don’t want to feel? This is a central question determining our self-worth.

We’ve been taught to push past these kinds of feelings. When our spouse gets a promotion, while we’re languishing, we should not feel spite. When a friend gets pregnant (while we’ve spent years trying), we should not be jealous. When a friend needs to cancel to care........

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