In March of 2020, thanatologist Cole Imperi gave us a word that we all needed—shadowloss. She accomplished this through her TED Talk called “Shadowloss: Shedding Light on Our Hidden Grief.” Shadowloss describes the grief we carry in our day-to-day lives that we often don’t share with others. It reminds us that the physical death of a loved one is not the only kind of loss. We may experience grief when we lose a job, a relationship, or a way of life; when we experience a health challenge; or when we must give up on a dream. It was a great pleasure to meet with Cole and have a conversation about shadowloss—what it is and how to navigate through it. The interview appears below:

DD: On your website, you provide a list of examples of shadowloss, such as divorce, medical diagnosis, estrangement, bankruptcy, and leaving a religious community. What else can you tell us about shadowloss?

CI: Shadowloss is a loss in life, not of life. It is a nonclinical term (which means it’s for use in everyday conversations) and is not a diagnosis. You cannot be diagnosed with shadowloss. You can, however, choose to use the word shadowloss to describe your own lived experience. It’s only a shadowloss if you say it is. The power is yours to assess the impact a loss had on you. For example, two people may each be going through a divorce, but only one would describe their divorce as a shadowloss. The term “shadowloss” gives a griever agency over their own experience.

DD: What is the best........

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