Parenting and Unconditional Love
As we approach a day centered on love, this piece feels especially timely. When I asked Eva Musby what she wanted other parents to understand, I listened closely. What she shared reaches many.
Eva is a parent advocate, author, and parent coach in the eating disorders field. The skills and principles she shares, however, extend far beyond eating disorders. They apply to any caregiver who loves someone navigating a mental health challenge.
A note on language: Though Eva uses she/her below, this piece is not limited by gender—or by any specific diagnosis.
Below is Eva's insight, in her own words.
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One afternoon, when my daughter was very ill, I met a generous young woman recovering from anorexia. As we parted, I asked her, “What’s the one most important thing I should focus on? The one thing that will make the biggest difference to my child?”
She didn’t hesitate. “Love her at all times. Even when she’s down. Even when she’s at her worst.”
That stayed with me.
Loving someone when they’re at their worst is the essence of unconditional love. But when my little girl developed anorexia—a life‑threatening illness that drastically alters our children—I found myself wrestling with two uncomfortable questions.
Question one: Is it healthy for love to be one‑sided? With an eating disorder where a child’s nervous system is in overwhelm, it’s common for parents to receive hate. Is it........
