Child Therapists On The ‘Innocent’ Habits They Wish Grandparents Would Stop Doing

Encouraging kids to keep ‘secrets’ is top of their list.

On Assignment For HuffPost

Regardless of their “grandparent style”, grandparents can be some of the most meaningful family members in a child’s life. They often provide a unique, warm love and care for their grandchild.

Grandkids often remember how their grandparents showed up for them, the stories they told and the yummy smells and tastes enjoyed at their home.

However, even the most well-meaning grandparents can make mistakes. Habits that seem “innocent” and “good” can actually be harmful, child therapists say.

If you’ve engaged in them without realising the problem, don’t beat yourself up. You’re far from alone, and you can fix things.

Ahead, child therapists share key examples of “innocent” habits that they actually want you to stop, plus why each one is harmful and the adjustment they’d make.

Encouraging kids to keep ‘secrets’

While you might say a phrase like “this is our little secret” or “don’t tell mum” to promote closeness, it’s “one of the most dangerous habits”, according to Jillian Amodio, a licensed mental health professional at Waypoint Wellness Center and founder of Moms for Mental Health. Even if the “secret” is just about having dessert before dinner or staying up past bedtime.

“Encouraging secret-keeping about small things opens up the door for predators to exploit the trust of a child and encourage them to keep unsafe behaviors or interactions from their parents,” she explained.

Do this instead: Amodio suggested reframing treats and “rule-bending” with a phrase like, “I know at home, Mom and Dad say no........

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