This article appears as part of the Unspun: Scottish Politics newsletter.

It’s common to hear those of a republican persuasion refer to the Royal family as ‘parasites’ on the body of Britain.

The comparison is apt but not perfect. A parasite is a creature which feasts upon its host, but – importantly – is consciously hated by that host. A better analogy for the Royal family and its relationship with much of Britain and the British people is the vampire.

The vampire, in the classic Bram Stoker sense, hypnotises its prey, turning victims into willing servants, before applying fang to neck and draining the target dry.

Picture poor old Renfield in the novel Dracula. A once robust, intelligent man, he’s reduced to a pitiful grovelling husk by the power the fiendish aristo wields over him. “I am here to do your bidding, Master,” Renfield mutters in his asylum cell. “I am your slave.”

Around half the population of these strange islands is rather Renfield in outlook: wide-eyed in wonder at the glamour of the Royals, and ready to bare their jugulars for a rampant sucking.

Those teeth go deep and plunge often. We’ve just learned that the price-tag for the coronation of Charles Windsor was £72 million minimum. Those are official figures from the Department of Culture, Media and Sport.

Opponents of monarchy, such as the lobby group Republic, put the costs at anywhere........

© Herald Scotland