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Manipulation relies on fear, guilt, shame, and coercion.

Strategic communication respects boundaries and is said in a respectful way.

If a narcissist calls you "manipulative," projection may be driving their accusation.

Many of my clients have reported that a narcissist accused them of being “manipulative.” Understandably, this can cause confusion and anger when you are the target of this accusation. Narcissists tend to project: They accuse you of doing something they are doing. Remember, with a narcissist, an accusation is a confession. I have had clients question if they are being manipulative when they have learned effective communication strategies with a narcissist. You can see how narcissists create doubt and confusion in their victims and make them question themselves. In this post, you will learn the difference between strategic communication and manipulation.

What Is Manipulation?

Manipulation is about controlling and/or punishing another person. Manipulation requires deception, coercion, guilting, shaming, and pressure. When someone is manipulative, they may lack the empathy to care about how their actions are harming another person. A manipulative person wants what they want, period.

That said, sometimes when people are in a desperate situation, they resort to manipulation to get what they need. That is different from the manipulation a narcissist uses day in and day out. A narcissist uses manipulation........

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