Sam got laid off from her job six months ago but is still upset about it—why her and how they handled it all.

Jake and Sam’s friends have probably pushed them to “just get over it.” Sometimes, it’s not that easy. If anger lingers, it’s because there are underlying drivers. Here are the most common ones:

While Jake and Sam can push their feelings to the backburner if they’re engaged at work or having a good time, their anger and those memories are never far away, always able to seep into any downtime. A common driver is a lack of closure.

Perhaps Jake and his ex had a terrible argument; she moved out the next day, and they had minimal contact afterward. Sam also got an email from human resources (HR) about her layoff but never had a chance to talk with HR or her supervisor afterward. With such cutoffs, you never get the answers you need to connect the dots—make sense of what happened, have the opportunity to get things off your chest and say your side of the story.

Solution: It's time to get things out of your head and heart that you’ve been ruminating about. Here, Jake and Sam write three letters to Jake’s ex and Sam’s supervisor. The first letter is about getting things off your chest: Handwrite what you want........

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