By Daniel Sexton, M.S., LMHC

When I was in graduate school, I was told to be aware that men in group therapy tend to be closed off, avoidant of expressing emotions, and have difficulty being vulnerable. This is not my experience. I find that men often crave the opportunity to be vulnerable, to be tender, and to have that given in kind. Some arrive at sessions with hard exteriors but underneath is a fear of revealing their inner selves to others.

Adverse childhood experiences, or ACEs, are stressful or traumatic events that happen in a child's life before the age of 18. They can include physical, emotional, or sexual abuse, witnessing violence in the home or community, neglect, or even household dysfunction like parental separation or mental illness. Such experiences can have a significant and lasting impact on a person's health and well-being, affecting them throughout adulthood.

Of the ten questions that comprise the test for ACEs, men report at a higher rate than women that a member of their household was incarcerated (Giano et al., 2020) and that they were physically abused (Jones et al., 2022). Growing up with a caregiver in jail or experiencing any form of abuse can be a heavy burden that most children and teens are not taught how to emotionally process.

Western society encourages men to handle events that can be traumatic with a display of stoicism and toughness. Some traumatic events are even considered acceptable for men to experience—warfare, fights, beatings—although they can be extremely physically destructive. Traumatic events that do not fall into these categories can quickly be normalized or swept away as unimportant despite being dangerous to one’s mental health.

When exploring the impact of ACEs on boys, harmful effects show up in the greater likelihood of males to externalize symptoms of PTSD than women (Jones et al., 2022). Externalized symptoms include aggression,........

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