Your 5-year-old wants to take Mr. Whiskers, your 15-year-old cat, to the supermarket. As you watch little Jimmy squeezing a meowing kitty next to the back door, should you

A. Tell him that you understand he loves spending time with the cat, but that cats don't like supermarkets.

B. Demand that he put the cat down, who is about to scratch him, and put his shoes on to go.

C. Explain that his request is making you anxious and that putting the cat down will relieve your anxiety.

D. Just put a leash on the cat and head out the door.

The answer to this question might show you a lot about the way you raise children. Although no one question can truly pinpoint your parenting style, if you answered B, you might tend toward authoritarian parenting. An answer of D might put you in the more indulgent parenting category (or perhaps you’re just having a very bad day). But, if you chose A or C, you might be the type of parent who adopts some or all of the tenets of “gentle parenting.”

“Gentle parenting” is a new parenting approach widely endorsed by contemporary parents of young children. British author Sarah Ockwell-Smith is often credited with this parenting style through her publication of The Gentle Parenting Book.

The underlying principles of gentle parenting (referred to here as GP) encourage a relationship with your child based on connection and communication as opposed to rules and expectations. The approach emphasizes empathy, respect, understanding, and boundary setting. It contrasts with “old school” parenting (typically labeled as authoritarian), which relies on control and punishment.

In the case of our hypothetical cat-at-the-grocery store question, answer C puts the emphasis on the emotion of someone other than the child, which suggests the parent is attempting to build empathy, a key tenet of the GP approach. Note that answer A to our kitty question includes both a recognition of the child’s........

© Psychology Today