Quick! What’s one thing that everybody tries to avoid even when it’s absolutely necessary?

That is, besides getting a root canal?

It’s initiating a difficult conversation with one's partner.

Practically no one looks forward to initiating a difficult conversation. (If you’re someone who does, we might be a bit concerned about you.) That’s because difficult conversations, by definition, are emotionally risky and challenging. The conversation might go badly. You might hurt your partner with what you say. You might get hurt by how your partner reacts. The whole endeavor might shake the foundations of your relationship, or lead to an unbridgeable impasse. No wonder people avoid having them.

Nevertheless, there are times when having a difficult conversation is necessary to maintaining a close, emotionally connected and intimate relationship. There comes a point when pretending that everything’s okay just doesn’t work anymore. On the positive side, getting through a difficult conversation successfully makes intimate relationships stronger, more stable and more emotionally intimate. As John Amodeo, our fellow Psychology Today blogger, so aptly stated, "Authentic, open, trustworthy communication is the life-blood of an intimate relationship."

So how do you do it? Especially when your partner’s someone who’s good at avoiding things?

As with many difficult things in life, the chance of it going smoothly and well is greatly improved by setting the proper stage ahead of time. Here are a few tips for going about having a difficult conversation that will make it just a bit easier.

Let’s go a little........

© Psychology Today