“It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters,” Epictetus, a Greek Stoic philosopher, once said.

Rarely do things go exactly as planned, especially during the holidays, and especially with our older relatives. Honestly, have the holidays ever gone exactly to plan? Does any day really go as planned?

As we put Thanksgiving behind us and approach Christmas, let’s consider what the ultimate objective is. For each person this answer will be different. For me, it is to enjoy precious time with my friends and family. It feels like time is a commodity all of us wish we could get more of.

Upholding traditions is also important but not at the expense of the quality of everyone’s experience.

Here are some best practices for enjoying the holidays with your older loved ones:

• Focus on what can be realistically accomplished. We must not get caught up in how things are supposed to go. Let your expectations evolve as your family changes.

Let’s use the stuffing as........

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