Most of our routine behaviors are not conscious choices. They’re either habits that run on autopilot, or they result from tacit judgments. Making conscious behavior choices in our long-term self-interest is difficult, due to our short-term oriented brains embedded with biased thinking. (It’s growing more difficult if the nearly 70% rise in the number of people in therapy since 2002 is a reliable indicator.) So, it’s not surprising that we make few choices that serve both self-interest and humane values of appreciation, compassion, and kindness. Instead, we tend to make what I call self-centered choices, driven by impulse or feelings.

Self-centered behavior choices seek comfort, convenience, preferences, ego-gratification, or ego-defense. Behavior choices seeking the latter two are rarely in our long-term self-interest.

Self-interest behavior choices seek psychological and physical well-being, success, or protection of loved ones, regardless of discomfort and........

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