Despite what we may believe, perfection doesn't imply an extreme; genuine perfection entails a balance between them.

So, while the question of "Is there such a thing as too much love?" may seem ridiculous to some, the answer is a complicated but direct, yes. Much of the popular literature on perfectionism tends to highlight trauma in its incubation, noting how exacting demands create the foundation for an obsession with "the shoulds," or excessively high standards. While this route may be more obvious and also easier to empathize with (we tend to feel more sympathy for those abused), there's an equal yet less direct one to perfectionism, which on the surface masks an underlying cruelty. This is the route of the doting parent, who attempts to correct for the mistakes of his own upbringing and/or even those of the other parent. Failing to acknowledge his limitations, as he believes he can offset the damage done elsewhere, and the potential consequences of his apparent benevolence, he may contribute to outcomes similar to his own, despite his efforts.

A parent who was mistreated as a child may, in part through black-and-white thinking, consider the antithesis of her childhood as the only solution to the problem of parenting, overcorrecting for the mistakes made by her parents. Offsetting being a bad daughter with being a good mother, she........

© Psychology Today