I once told a workplace leader, "I don't feel like you heard me." His response? He said, "I hear you, man," and then promptly left, which didn't give me any opportunity to respond. Umm, tell me that you didn't hear me without saying that you didn't hear me.

Not being heard or seen is a common problem in work and social situations as well as in life in general. From the time we belt out our very first cry after being born, we all have an inherent ongoing need for someone, whether it's our parents, doctors, nurses, friends, supervisors, coworkers, significant others, or social media followers, to pay some attention to us. After all, regardless of how independent you may be, your sense of self, identity, feeling of safety in the world, and thus happiness can be tied to how others around you perceive you—or don't.

That's a major reason why some people can't stop talking about themselves during meetings, parties, dates, or social media posts. Indeed, the loudest person in the room can often garner the most attention, regardless of what that person has to offer—sort of like playing the bagpipes in a library. With so many other people loudly telling everyone,........

© Psychology Today