When Chris asked Hope out on a date, she was thrilled because she really liked him, but to the surprise of her friends, she turned him down. She wanted to play hard to get.

“Playing hard to get” is when someone pretends that they’re less interested in a potential mate than they really are in order to encourage them to be more interested, especially in the courtship phase of a romantic relationship. Common tactics of this dating strategy include acting aloof and unavailable to the intended person, avoiding their calls and texts, appearing disinterested, and even flirting with or dating someone else. In some ways, it’s related to the saying, “Treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen.” These tricks are intended to motivate the suitor to chase after them and work harder for their attention. Playing hard to get is believed to be an effective way to attract a mate. It’s an old staple of advice columns, well-meaning friends, and it’s a well-worn trope in popular culture. But does this classic dating technique really work?

For a dating strategy that seems straight out of a romantic comedy, there’s actually a substantial body of........

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