“I can’t stand my parents. I am just waiting until next year when I leave for college and don’t have to deal with them anymore.”

“My mom drove me to therapy today because I’m grounded from the car for 2 weeks. I got a speeding ticket. It sucks not to have a car but I guess I get why they did that.”

My teen clients have lots to say about their parents in our therapy sessions. Which one of these quotes sounds like the experience of connection with parents?

While we all need connection with other humans, it can be a lifeline for teens and emerging adults. Adolescents are discovering themselves and finding their way in the world beyond family. On their way toward independence, social relationships with peers become a bridge. During this process of trial and error, as they figure themselves out and find “their people,” teens are in a precarious place and critically need predictable and stable connections. Parents and other helping adults are the stakes that ground teens during a time of great change, growth, and necessary risk-taking. These connections have the greatest power to affect, influence, and impact adolescents’ emotional health........

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