Relational trauma impacts our ability to form secure, healthy attachments.

In this two-part post, we explore how relational trauma can deeply impact our ability to form healthy relationships in dating and marriage.

The preeminent couples counselor, researcher, and mental health thought leader Ester Perel, LMFT, has often been quoted as saying, “The quality of our relationships determines the quality of our lives.”

And yet, increasing bodies of research tell us those of us who come from relational trauma histories often struggle mightily in our relationships.

What do I mean by this? And what impact does that have on the quality of our lives? Let’s unpack this.

Relational trauma—particularly the kind of trauma that results over the course of time in the context of a power-imbalanced and dysfunctional relationship (usually between a child and caregiver)—can result in a host of complex and lingering biopsychosocial impacts for the individual who endured the trauma.

The term “biopsychosocial impacts” refers to the combined effects of biological, psychological, and social factors on an individual’s health, well-being, and overall functioning.

This concept recognizes that a person’s health and experiences are influenced by a complex interplay of biological (physical), psychological (mental and emotional), and social (environmental and societal) factors.

Understanding these impacts involves considering how various aspects of a person’s biology, mental health, and social........

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