Over the past decade, mental health literacy has gone mainstream. Therapy language used to be confined to clinical settings and academic journals, but now, it crops up everywhere from TikTok captions to relationship arguments. We talk about “boundaries,” “triggers,” “emotional labor,” and “inner children” with the fluency of a licensed counselor or social worker.

This cultural therapeutic reckoning looks a lot like progress—and in many ways, it definitely is. Greater awareness has reduced stigma surrounding mental health, helped people articulate their needs, and given people the necessary courage to seek professional help. That said, there’s also a newfound downside to this therapeutic fluency, which is showing up most predominantly in everyday relationships.

Very few non-professionals using this language have a full, well-rounded academic understanding of the concepts they’re actually invoking. As a result of this, therapy language has quickly started to lose its original meaning. Instead, it’s become a crutch, a shield, or even a moral high ground.

Here’s how this can backfire in relationships, according to psychological research.

Few therapy terms have entered popular culture as fully (or as confusingly) as boundaries have. In clinical contexts, boundaries are about

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