What Is Perfectionism?

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While most believe people are trying their best, perfectionists tend to believe they can always do better.

Socially-prescribed perfectionists tend to try to meet others' excessive demands to prove they're special.

Addressing one's philosophy of others may help reveal internal emotional struggles.

There are two general philosophies most of us have about others. On the one hand, many, if not most, believe that others are trying their best, usually if not always. These individuals don’t presume to know the hardships other people are experiencing but believe in their core goodness. So, they don’t need to know specifically what someone is struggling with to give them grace.

On the other hand, some, if not a select few, believe that you should always try your best. The distinction is meaningful. The second perspective implies a directive because accompanying it is the belief that others aren’t always trying their best and, in fact, usually aren’t.

The demands of perfectionism

Other-oriented perfectionists, those who hold others to extremely high standards, tend to view people as lazy, hypocritical, and dependent in comparison to themselves, who they view as diligent, rational, and independent. Their disdain is expressed through comments like, “You can always do better,” and “But did you really try your best?”

So, you may be damned if you do and damned if you don’t. If you admit that you didn’t perform........

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