For most of my life, I believed I had reached the end of the road before my life had truly begun. I believed I had been born gay, that my attractions defined me permanently, and that no amount of prayer could ever change that reality. Eventually, I concluded that if God would not change that, then perhaps He intended for me to remain exactly as I was. That belief shaped years of confusion, resentment, self-justification, and spiritual distance. Today, after more than three decades living a very different life, I no longer believe the most important question is whether someone was born this way. I believe the more important question is whether any of us is willing to be transformed.

That perspective did not come easily. It emerged through years of personal struggle, spiritual conflict, and painful introspection. Long before I entered the gay lifestyle, my sense of identity had already been fractured by childhood sexual abuse, shame, rejection, and deep feelings of inadequacy. Like many people carrying unresolved wounds, I spent years searching for affirmation, belonging, and emotional security. My same-sex attractions became intertwined with those unmet emotional needs, and eventually, I accepted the belief that homosexuality was simply who I was.

I tried desperately to reconcile that identity with my Christian faith. I could not. The tension between the two eventually became unbearable. I chose to walk away from Christianity and immerse myself fully in gay culture because, in my mind, the alternatives were impossible. Either God had made me this way, or He was unwilling to help me change.

For years, I accepted the........

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