The holiday season marks its arrival in many ways: the sound of cicadas, the appearance of mince pies in bakery windows, a Netflix romcom in which a successful career woman falls in love with an anthropomorphic chimney or snowman. But for me, the holidays begin in the most magical place of all – my inbox.

As soon as the Halloween spam clears (“There’s nothing spooky about these savings”) the real meaning of Christmas can begin to be celebrated in its purest form: gift guides.

Christmas present requests are becoming increasingly expensive.Credit: Getty Images

Starting around November, (although they seem to be appearing earlier each year) every store, influencer and publication I’ve passingly interacted with reaches out with important news. They are here to assist me in my search for the perfect present for every person in my life.

And they mean every person. I don’t often think of anyone in my life as a “theme-park enthusiast who has everything”. But if I need to shop for one, Vulture helpfully suggests an Animatronic Mini Songbird for $595.

In theory, I don’t hate the tradition of........

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