Julian wasn’t expecting anything unusual when he pulled up to pick up his stepdaughter from school. Just another ordinary afternoon errand. But when one of her classmates pointed at him and asked who he was, his stepdaughter answered without hesitating for even a second.

Stepping up to just ‘dad’

Julian shared the moment in a TikTok video that quickly resonated with thousands of viewers, many of whom have lived some version of this story themselves. He said he wasn’t sure she’d ever give him that title — not because things were bad between them, but because he’d never pushed for it. He’d just tried to show up, consistently, and let her lead.

@jayvalenz_20 she loves me yall lol #girldad #stepdad #chicago #school #daughter ♬ death bed (coffee for your head) – Powfu & beabadoobee

she loves me yall lol #girldad #stepdad #chicago #school #daughter ♬ death bed (coffee for your head) – Powfu & beabadoobee

That’s what made the moment so meaningful. She didn’t say it for him. She said it because it was simply true to her.

People knew how it made him feel

The comments filled up almost immediately with people who understood exactly what that kind of moment feels like. One commenter wrote that her husband cried the first time one of his stepsons said the same thing. Another, who grew up with a stepfather herself, offered a perspective worth sitting with: “She will see you differently the moment you just call her your daughter, not a stepdaughter. Just like how you felt — that feeling is the same both ways.”

Kids are figuring things out, too

That symmetry is easy to miss in blended families, where so much of the emotional weight tends to fall on the adults trying to figure out their role. Kids are often doing the same calculus quietly on their end, watching to see if this person is going to stick around, wondering what to call them, not wanting to get it wrong either.

Julian ended his video saying he was going to take her out for food — which, as many commenters pointed out, is about the most dad response imaginable.

The title of “dad” isn’t something you can ask for or negotiate. It’s conferred. And apparently, a school pickup on an ordinary afternoon is exactly the kind of place where it happens.

You can follow Julian (@jayvalenz_20) on TikTok for more content on parenting and family. 

Ifrah Mansour is no stranger to conflict.

A Somali refugee and current resident of Minneapolis, the multimedia artist and activist draws on her lived experiences to create work that explores trauma, displacement, and resilience. But like so many of the guests on Freedom to Thrive, an award-winning podcast produced by the National Immigration Law Center (NILC), Mansour doesn’t want to focus only on trauma; she also wants to celebrate the unexpected beauty she’s found during difficult experiences.

“One of the beautiful things about tragedies is that it activates hearts, and courageous people are born,” she says. For example, Mansour has noticed more Minnesotans than ever are reaching out to help the vulnerable, after the anti-immigrant crackdowns carried out by the Department of Homeland Security. “They are bringing food, they’re bringing extra clothes, they’re walking with people, and it’s just really beautiful.”

Hector Flores, co-founder of the Las Cafeteras and host of Freedom to Thrive, agrees with her. A child of immigrants himself, he has also seen how hope and hardship often live side by side.

Flores comes from a family with mixed status and is highly aware of the challenges immigrants and refugees in his community face, and how they’re affected by people’s misconceptions. “People want to know about trauma all the time, but we’re more than just undocumented,” he says. “We’re artists, singers, creatives … there’s so much richness in the culture.”

At its core, Flores’ comment is exactly what the Freedom to Thrive podcast is all about: Celebrating immigrants as complex, dynamic individuals, and challenging the dominant narrative that too often reduces them to symbols of hardship.

Launched in 2024, Freedom to Thrive explores heritage, resilience, community, and the ways art and comedy can spark social change. Now in its second season, the podcast continues to feature conversations with immigrants, policymakers, artists, musicians, activists, and more. Recent guests have included comedian Mo Amer, Grammy Award-winning singer Lila Downs, and Pulitzer Prize-winning author Viet Thanh Nguyen.

Where the first season focused on individual stories of identity and belonging, Flores says his goal for season two, where he joins as host, is to “take it to the next level” — using storytelling to highlight “the fact that we’re more similar than different.”

One recent podcast episode drives this point home. In December, Flores interviewed Bryan Andrews, a rising country music star and rural Missouri native who frequently uses his platform to speak about issues affecting immigrant families. At the heart of his message and his songwriting, Andrews says, is the idea that small-town Americans and the rest of the country, including immigrants, have more in common than they realize.

“It doesn’t matter where you’re from,” Andrews says on the podcast. “We’re all trying to make a living and we’re tired of getting railroaded by corporate greed or by politicians who don’t care.”

Rural Americans, Andrews says, are often stereotyped as racist and misogynistic but “the overwhelming majority of people in my home town have love in their hearts.” Media stereotypes often amplify differences and divide, he says, but at the end of the day, “we’re all in this together.”

Flores, who was raised in a working-class immigrant neighborhood in East Los Angeles, had similar thoughts. He says he often sees its residents stereotyped as wealthy, consumerist, and status obsessed. “That exists, but that’s not my life, that’s not my community,” he says. Like small-town Americans, people in the city “just want to work hard and take care of their families. We all want the same thing.”

Although the podcast tackles some heavy issues, each episode’s ultimate focus is how personal and collective struggles can be healed through art, driving home a message of hope and resilience: 

Mansour’s episode about her experiences in Minnesota is just one of many examples. Flores asks her,

“What gives you hope for the people creating a home here?”

“The love I feel from other Minnesotans. It is trumping any hate we’re experiencing,” she replies.

CTA: Stream all episodes now on the Freedom to Thrive YouTube channel or the website, here. 

The podcast has been nominated for a Webby in the “Belonging & Inclusion” category. You can vote for it to win until Thursday, April 16!

This article is part of Upworthy’s “The Threads Between U.S.” series that highlights what we have in common thanks to the generous support from the Levis Strauss Foundation, whose grantmaking is committed to creating a culture of belonging. 

Grey hair has been a concern for people since before hair dye was invented. Some people pluck them and dye them as soon as they see them growing in, while others embrace the silvery hairs. Chiara Do’wal Sehi (Sunshine) Enriquez, an Indigenous woman from the Karankawa Tribe, recently shared her excitement about learning she had grey hair.

For a brief period of time, people were actually dyeing their hair grey prematurely. It wasn’t uncommon to meet a 20-something with “granny grey” purplish-silver hair, but the popularity faded nearly as fast as it started. But for Enriquez, grey hair isn’t a fad or something to hide. It’s a right of passage to celebrate.

During the colonization of the Texas Gulf Coast where the Karankawa originated, the Indigenous tribe was nearly eliminated. According to the Texas State Historical Association, the Karankawa people fought to maintain their land from 1685 until 1858 from French and Spanish settlers. Due to this multi-century, on-and-off battle for their territory, the tribe’s numbers became so small that they were considered “extinct.”

Enriquez is a descendant of the small number of Karankawa that survived. To her, living long enough to experience the growth of grey hair is a gift. The woman shares how much her “unruly” greys mean to her in a video uploaded to her Instagram page.

“I got my hair styled today. I don’t get it cut. It’s a cultural belief that I was taught by my mother. We don’t cut our hair, we let it grow. We save the cut for very, very serious and important moments in our lives,” she says while sitting in her car.

The woman explains that while she was having her hair styled, she asked the hairdresser about the texture of her hair. This is when she learned of her wiry new strands. She surprised hairdresser with her delighted response. “She said to me that it was because I had many little greys, and the unruly ones that were pushing up my other hair that weren’t grey were causing it to be a little bit........

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