Albert Einstein’s advice to his son is applicable wisdom for parents today raising resilient kids |
Kids today are struggling with resilience. A study from the Johns Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health found that only 40% of school-age children in the United States were “flourishing.”
Study leader Christina D. Bethell explained more about how researchers defined “flourishing.” She noted, “Family resilience and connection were important for flourishing in all children, regardless of their level of adversity. Parent-child connection had a particularly strong association with child flourishing.”
And it’s that lack of resilience that highlights the struggle many kids face today, as well as the challenge for parents trying to instill it in them. It’s something Albert Einstein was aware of in the early 1900s and worked to cultivate in his three children.
Einstein’s advice on resilience
Einstein was the father of three children with his first wife, Mileva Marić: a daughter named Lieserl, and two sons, Hans Albert and Eduard. Eduard was the youngest and had great intellectual potential, and he was studying for a career in medicine.
However, Eduard was afflicted by schizophrenia, which derailed his professional life. He was in and out of a psychiatric sanatorium in Zurich, Switzerland, throughout his life. Einstein described Eduard as having a “delicate nervous system.”
But the relationship between father and son produced a famous quote from Einstein on raising resilient children, drawn from a 1930 letter to his son Eduard:
“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.”
Einstein encouraged his son to keep moving forward despite his challenges, comparing life’s difficulties to riding a bike and the skills needed to do so, such as balance and momentum.
How to raise resilient kids
According to the American Psychological Association (APA), resilience is the “process and outcome of successfully adapting to difficult or challenging life experiences, especially through mental, emotional, and behavioral flexibility and adjustment to external and internal demands.”
Many parents want to raise resilient children. The APA has shared several helpful ways parents can strengthen their children’s resilience:
A child’s resilience begins with having a healthy caregiver. “If you want a child to be functioning well, tend to the person who’s tending the child,” Suniya Luthar, PhD, a professor of psychology at Arizona State University, explained.
Parents who sought extra support from resources like community support groups and mental health services showed more positive parenting outcomes.
Stick with a daily routine
Structure is key to raising resilient kids. Keeping things consistent with schedules, such as setting times for schoolwork and play, creates an environment of comfort and can better help them develop emotional regulation.
Establish time to check in
Having regular talks with kids can help them feel safe, express themselves, and receive support. The APA recommends that parents “listen to their concerns and fears when they address them with you and let them know you are there for them.”
Build them up by reflecting
Focusing on past “wins” and moments of strength during difficult times is another important way to continue building resilience. Discuss times of accomplishment, such as when kids trusted themselves or made “appropriate decisions.”
A single door can open up a world of endless possibilities. For homeowners, the front door of their house is a gateway to financial stability, job security, and better health. Yet for many, that door remains closed. Due to the rising costs of housing, 1 in 3 people around the world wake up without the security of safe, affordable housing.
Since 1976, Habitat for Humanity has made it their mission to unlock and open the door to opportunity for families everywhere, and their efforts have paid off in a big way. Through their work over the past 50 years, more than 65 million people have gained access to new or improved housing, and the movement continues to gain momentum. Since 2011 alone, Habitat for Humanity has expanded access to affordable housing by a hundredfold.
A world where everyone has access to a decent home is becoming a reality, but there’s still much to do. As they celebrate 50 years of building, Habitat for Humanity is inviting people of all backgrounds and talents to be part of what comes next through Let’s Open the Door, a global campaign that builds on this momentum and encourages people everywhere to help expand access to safe, affordable housing for those who need it most. Here’s how the foundation to a better world starts with housing, and how everyone can pitch in to make it happen.
Globally, almost 3 billion people, including 1 in 6 U.S. families, struggle with high costs and other challenges related to housing. A crisis in itself, this also creates larger problems that affect families and communities in unexpected ways. People who lack affordable, stable housing are also more likely to experience financial hardship in other areas of their lives, since a larger share of their income often goes toward rent, utilities, and frequent moves. They are also more likely to experience health problems due to chronic stress or environmental factors, such as mold. Housing insecurity also goes hand-in-hand with unstable employment, since people may need to move further from their jobs or switch jobs altogether to offset the cost of housing.
Affordable homeownership creates a stable foundation for families to thrive, reducing stress and increasing the likelihood for good health and stable employment. Habitat for Humanity builds and repairs homes with individual families, but it also strengthens entire communities as well. The MicroBuild® Initiative, for example, strengthens communities by increasing access to loans for low-income families seeking to build or repair their homes. Habitat ReStore locations provide affordable appliances and building materials to local communities, in addition to creating job and volunteer opportunities that support neighborhood growth.
Everyone can play a part in the fight for housing equity and the pursuit of a better world. Over the past 50 years, Habitat for Humanity has become a leader in global housing thanks to an engaged network of volunteers—but you don’t need to be skilled with a hammer to make a meaningful impact. Building an equitable future means calling on a wide range of people and talents.Here’s how you can get involved in the global housing movement:
Speaking up on social media about the growing housing crisis
Volunteering on a Habitat for Humanity build in your local community
Travel and build with Habitat in the U.S. or in one of 60 countries where we work around the globe
Join the Let’s Open the Door movement and, when you donate, you can create your own personalized door
Shop or donate at your local Habitat ReStore
Every action, big and small, drives a global movement toward a better future. A safe home unlocks opportunity for families and communities alike, but it’s volunteers and other supporters, working together with a shared vision, who can open the door for everyone.
Visit habitat.org/open-door to learn more and get involved today.
As a parent, if your kids don’t occasionally hate you, you’re probably not doing your job. It’s never fun, but it is a mom or dad’s main responsibility to keep their children safe, healthy, and to help them develop into a well-rounded adult. That often means saying the dreaded “No.” A lot.
The uncomfortable part is that children rarely see the wisdom in their parents’ decisions. And sometimes they make their displeasure very well known in ways that can sting.
Mom stumbles upon 9-year-old’s hand-drawn comics, finds a surprise villain
Utah-based mom Stacy Goulding happened upon a couple of homemade comic books her nine-year-old son had drawn. Filled with creative titles and lively artwork, they made for an impressive collection.
Goulding took to Instagram to show off how the hero, a character named Emerald Warrior, did battle in each edition with a new foe: Emerald Warrior vs Farty Balloon, Emerald Warrior vs Mean Clown, and Emerald Warrior vs Bad Spider, to name a few.
But it was the last comic book that prompted Goulding to title her video: “Moms, if you want ot feel better about yourself, continue watching.”
In a comic titled “Emerald Warrior vs No Mom,” the hero takes on a mean looking lady in a red dress who says “No” to everything. “Once upon a time there was a mom that never answers her kids questions and always says No,” the comic reads. “Her kids were really sad.”
But don’t worry, Emerald Warrior would soon come to the rescue. On the next page, he appears out of nowhere and sprays “Yes Spray” on the mean mom, fixing everything. All the children cheered. The end.
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Mom points out the irony of the story
Goulding clearly got a good laugh out of the situation, but couldn’t help but notice the overdramatic irony of her being cast as the villain in the story.
“It’s always interesting seeing ourselves through the eyes of our children,” Goulding wrote in the caption, before going on to explain that her son made the comic after a spring break full of swimming, hiking, birthday parties, late night movies, biking, and more.
“I think for having a ‘no mom’ they have it pretty good,” she writes of her kids.
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Other parents can relate
Some reassured Goulding that she was on the right track:
“The creativity and imagination of it all clearly does say that yes, you are killing it! And the entire series?!? AMAZING.”
“mine told me I was an evil villain yesterday..bc she couldn’t jump off her top bunk into a pile of stuffed animals..I’d rather be the evil villain instead of the ambulance driver”
Others were impressed by the boy’s drawing and writing skills. Clearly his boredom and frustration were channeled beautifully into his art:
“This might be the best parenting advice on the internet! Tell your kids ‘no’ more often so they have to learn how to entertain themselves, develop creativity and writing skills and discover the power of persuasive rhetoric …I think you’ve solved parenting”
Others, still, just wanted to know where they could get their hands on this magical Yes Spray.
Kids being frustrated is extremely common and normal
Rest assured, parents, it’s OK and totally normal for your kids to say they hate you—or even to cast you as the villain in their life story. They don’t actually hate you, but it’s sometimes the only way for their brain to process the big feelings of rejection, anger, and frustration at not getting what they want.
Drawing, and art in general, is another way they process these emotions.
Goulding, for her part, handled the discovery of the comics like a total pro. Experts say the best way to handle something like this is to “kill it with kindness,” according to Today’s Parent. Don’t react, laugh it off, and remind them that you love them no matter what.
Bonus points if you can post their moody artwork on the Internet to let hundreds of thousands of other parents know they’re not alone.
The office potluck was a success! People went back for seconds; someone joked about licking the pan (and actually got a few laughs). And now you find yourself in the kitchen, alone with your overeager coworker, her........