LAST UPDATE | 9 mins ago

IF MIKE WHITE, creator of HBO’s hit The White Lotus, is short of inspiration for the next season of his anthology series, here’s a gift of an idea for an origin story. No, really, Mr White, I insist.

A dimwit billionaire couple, lounging around on a fellow billionaire’s yacht in the azure Adriatic waters (which of course they mistake for the Mediterranean) decide to go for a swim. They spot a spectacular subtropical island and swim to one of its pristine beaches.

Barefoot and besotted, they climb to the top of the island, unwittingly dodging tonnes of unexploded ordnance and thousands of nesting vipers en route.

When they get to the top, the view is so spectacular they agree they simply must own it. $1.4 billion (€1.21 billion) and a few shady backroom deals later, their dream comes true. Or does it?….

Sazan Island, an island with natural, unspoilt beauty off the coast of Albania, but also with a curious military past... Google Maps Google Maps

White is a master of blistering satire about entitled white Americans seeking enlightenment in far-flung seven-star resorts. But even he would be hard-pressed to surpass Ivanka Trump’s breathless account of how she and her husband discovered their very own Love Island.

Or the shady backstory to the sunny acquisition that has led to a shitstorm of epic proportions.

Sometime after Ivanka emerged from the Adriatic Ocean (if you’re thinking Ursula Andress in Dr No rest assured she probably is too) and onto the Sazan shore, Donald Trump won the 2024 Presidential election and the Albanian government hastily green lit their plan to develop Sazan into a retreat for the ultrawealthy, along with a separate $4.7 billion (€4.07 billion) 10,000 hotel room and villa development adjacent to the Narta Lagoon, a pristine stretch of the Adriatic coast.

The 200 million luxury yacht that Ivanka and Jared have holidayed on in the Adriatic Coast. Alamy Stock Photo Alamy Stock Photo

They were granted ‘strategic investor status’ for both projects, which allowed them to breeze past environmental protection orders and local ownership claims.

Last weekend, private security guards and contractors arrived at and set about fencing off the previously public beach while contractors started tearing up the hitherto protected area, sparking violent clashes with protesters.

This coincided with the release of Ivanka’s podcast with David Senra, where she breathlessly recounts how she ‘found’ the 1400-hectare island, as if she happened upon a treasure in the attic.

Overnight, it seemed as though the whole of Albania was up in arms about the deal. Protests spilled onto........

© TheJournal