The Dignity of Choosing Your Own Cereal |
More than twenty years ago, I asked my Uncle Sholom why Colel Chabad distributed food in a certain way.
I honestly don’t remember the details of the program itself. He probably doesn’t remember the conversation at all. But his answer stayed with me for decades.
“Just because someone is poor doesn’t mean they can’t choose what cereal they want for breakfast.”
As a child, I heard kindness in that sentence.
As an adult, I understand that what he was really talking about was dignity.
There are many organizations that feed people. Far fewer understand how humiliating it can feel to need help in the first place. Hunger is painful. But so is losing your sense of self, your privacy, your ability to choose.
That single sentence became, for me, the clearest explanation of what makes Colel Chabad different. Not just the scale of what they do, but the philosophy underneath it: people do not stop being people when they become needy.
A struggling mother still wants to buy her child’s favorite cereal. A father still wants to walk into a supermarket without everyone knowing he cannot afford dinner. People need dignity almost as much as they need food.
As a child, what struck me most about my uncle’s life was how exciting it seemed. Airports. Travel. Important meetings around the world.
I didn’t understand then that he wasn’t traveling because he enjoyed being away. I didn’t understand the exhaustion of carrying responsibility that never fully leaves your shoulders.
He would come home for the resting part and then leave again.
Only as an adult did I realize how much of ordinary life he quietly gave up in service of other........