They Rebuilt. But Were They Fine? |
“After the Holocaust, people didn’t talk about trauma. They got married, had children, and rebuilt their lives. Why can’t people do the same today?”
It’s usually said with good intentions. Sometimes with frustration. Occasionally with judgment.
And every time, I feel uncomfortable. Because part of it is true. And part of it is not.
Yes, people rebuilt. They built families. They built businesses. They built a country. They created life in places where there had been almost none left.
But that is only part of the story. The real question is what they carried while building it.
For many years, we told ourselves a simple story. They were strong. They moved on.
In my own family, that story exists.
My grandparents came from Greece, France, Germany, and Hungary. Each of them has a different story of how they survived the war. They lost almost everything. And they rebuilt.
They created stability. They moved forward. They had children, grandchildren and even met some of their great grandchildren. They often called them “my revenge on Hitler.”
But they also passed other things on.
A fear of saying goodbye like it might be the last time. A feeling that safety is temporary. An instinct to always be ready to move, that slowing down is dangerous.
This part is harder........