When it was announced last week that Margot Robbie will follow up the success of Barbie with a film based on Monopoly, my heart sank, did not pass go, and did not collect £200. Robbie’s production company will partner with Hasbro, just as the Barbie film was an initiative from rival toy company Mattel. Barbie was criticised for being little more than a 114-minute toy ad, but it did so well at the box office – buoyed, significantly, by a $150m marketing budget, which was larger than that spent on making the film – that a glut of similar titles are planned: a Barney film produced by Daniel Kaluuya, a Polly Pocket film written and directed by Lena Dunham, and a film based on the card game Uno. Robbie is also making a film version of The Sims video game, while Hasbro has licensed a Play-Doh feature film, a cinematic adaptation of an inert substance.

Where does it end? Why not make Alpro vegan yoghurt into a series of detective novels? Why not write an opera about the Adidas Predator football boot? Or, for that matter, why not “imagineer” your way to full 360, helicopter-vision integrated brand synergy and make a football boot inspired by Wagner’s Ring cycle, or a Raymond Chandler-themed yoghurt? It is almost as if the gatekeepers of popular culture have completely run out of........

© The Guardian