This one goes out to all my Trump homies. To the MAGA voter, the Trump supporter, the fascist-curious, the Red Stater, the Fox News viewer, the boat parader, the “Let’s Go Brandon” flag flier, the “f--- your feelings” T-shirt wearer.

To the mighty 49.8 percent: congratulations! You got your man. Orange Julius is about to once again rest his ample a-- behind the Resolute Desk. My question to all you is simple: What are you hoping to get out of Trump II? When this second go-round has concluded, how will you determine whether it was a success? And what makes you think this time will be any better than the last?

We already know his first administration was a disaster: multiple impeachments, a million dead Americans, the economy in the toilet, jobs lost, a final job approval rating of 34 percent, etc. No wonder you want him back. After all, with a record like that, there’s a lot of room for improvement.

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Trump supporters might credibly cry “foul” to that final report card. After all, it’s not his fault a global pandemic came out of nowhere. Fair point, except that we don’t judge presidencies as if they were rhythmic gymnastics competitions. We don’t throw out the best year and the worst year to get an average score.

If we followed MAGA logic, Herbert Hoover would be on Mt. Rushmore. After all, didn’t those 1920s roar? They sure did, right up until the moment that pesky Depression hit. Which returns me to my question: Now that we’ve seen the theatrical release of the Trump presidency, what are you hoping for in the director’s cut?

What metrics are y’all using to determine success this time around? What do you need to happen before you consider the second Trump presidency a success? Are you expecting him to finish the wall? If you recall, last time he ran on building a “big, beautiful wall” across the entirety of the southern border, funded by our amigos to the south. Did that........

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