It’s Thanksgiving, the time for all of us, despite the challenges we face, to reflect on all the things that we should be grateful for. For the five of you who have actually read things I’ve written before, the following may seem discordantly nice and sweet… well that’s the new me, optimistic and hopeful now that America Is Great Again:

I’m thankful that it no longer matters how many times one has (allegedly) transported 17 year olds across state lines or attended drug-fueled orgies, one can still be considered for a cabinet appointment—or at least become a star on Cameo.

I am thankful I never got frequent flyer miles on the Lolita Express or Spirit........

© The Daily Beast