The ability to fake cry is a tried-and-true ability that any person must be armed with to make it onto reality television. It’s an essential tool to have in your arsenal, critical for when accusations start flying about pretend asthma or not being a girl’s girl. Crocodile tears are a defense mechanism so dutifully employed that, when another Housewife calls them out, it’s a fourth wall-breaking shocker. Real Housewives of New York alum Bethenny Frankel even memorably blasted her former co-star Ramona Singer for pulling her tearful act in Season 9, responding to Singer’s hysterics by plainly telling her, “The waterworks are not of interest to me.”
How ironic, then, that Frankel spent much of her time on reality television policing other people’s faux-motional reactions, but couldn’t manage to conjure a tear of her own in her new Lifetime original movie, Danger in the Dorm. In the film—which premiered June 16 on the go-to network for films like Yoga Teacher Killer, Gaslit by My Husband, and Living with My Mother’s Killer—Frankel plays Joanne, the mother of headstrong college freshman Kathleen (Clara Alexandrova), whose move to her university’s dorm quickly turns deadly. When Kathleen’s best friend is murdered, Joanna jumps into action, demanding that her daughter unenroll from school. But Kathleen is reluctant to leave, vowing to stay and protect the other girls on campus until the killer is apprehended.
When the discord between mother and daughter starts brewing, Frankel arrives on set ready to do the work. It’s as if she showed up with the same prickliness as she did the RHONY trip where she had an emotional meltdown/breakthrough that nearly ended in a cardiac event. Frankel is far less convincing in scenes where she has to show emotions other than stridency, anger, and fear. But, surprisingly, Frankel’s talent holds down this modest little piece of cable camp. Alright, maybe........