Launching a new range of padded knickers to create “an ample-bottomed curvy silhouette,” M&S declares: “We're doing for bums what we've done for boobs for years.”

However, before embarking on the padded-knickers concept, did no-one at M&S take a look at average people in average high streets and notice that, far from needing more padding on their derrières, plenty of people, both male and female, could use a lot less? Indeed, there may be a case for the NHS setting up a bum bank for buttock donors. I have every confidence you lot can come up with a suitable name.

After endless spills and leaks, the Liberal Democrats are calling for the Government to place Thames Water into something called “ special administration.” This is probably because it's difficult to put a water company into liquidation.