For so many post-traumatic parents trying to break the cycles that almost broke them, learning how to parent feels like an Olympic-level task. We know what we don’t want to do, but what do we actually do?

Jackie is a post-traumatic parent who is trying to parent with presence, unlike her alcoholic mother, who was always in a world of her own. In a recent class, she said:

I don’t know how to have conversations. You know in sitcoms, where the kid sits down with the parent, and the parent says those wise things that are helpful in the moment but are also life lessons? I don’t know how to do that.

For many post-traumatic parents, it can be difficult to figure out how to teach kids values and life lessons. We don’t always know how to start or what to say, and how to keep a conversation meaningful, without going into lecture mode. It never seems to be the opportune moment, but it feels like those moments are slipping by and we’re missing an important opportunity.

Is this you? Do you wonder how to have conversations with your kids? Here’s one hack.

The Olympics seems to be everywhere these days. If your kids are interested in watching, it’s a perfect time to capitalize on their interest and point out a few essential truths about life, grit, and achieving goals.

As you’re watching some amazing gymnastics or swimming or volleyball, you can casually point out that one thing is absolutely true of all the athletes—they all were beginners once.

There was a time when Simone Biles hadn’t yet learned........

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