Everyone sees Marcus as a “nice guy.” But he tends to be over-responsible and knows he doesn’t like conflict—automatically accommodating when emotions rise, constantly walking on eggshells, and doing what he thinks he needs to do not to trigger the other person.

If Henry gets into an argument with his partner, Tara, he eventually hits some point where he shuts down. Tara admits that she has a quick temper—she easily flares up when her expectations aren’t met—and Henry’s silence only fuels her anger more.

We all have learned ways to manage our emotions and relationships in childhood, especially when we feel criticized, dismissed, neglected, micromanaged, or unappreciated. But as children, our options were........

© Psychology Today