Living through the sorrow of unrequited love is not easy, especially if the ending of a relationship is unexpected or sudden. Even when there are warning signs, many can’t, or don’t want to, recognize them.

It is natural for the partner left behind to experience a grieving process to work through their feelings of loss and confusion. They reach out to friends and family members for comfort and support. In time, most are able to search for love again, hopefully armored with lessons they don’t want to repeat.

But for some others, that resolution feels out of reach. They feel immobilized, unable to accept that their dreams for a future are forever gone. No matter how hard they try, they cannot let go of what once was and is no longer.

Throughout more than four decades of practicing therapy, I have spent many hours helping such tortured souls understand what has kept them from being unable to let go of their sorrow.

As they unearth underlying issues, they often realize that such issues have been present in every relationship they’ve had, sabotaging prior loves in a way they did not realize before. Understanding in a new way, they can both heal from their past losses and prevent future ones from happening.

The 10 most common underlying issues that may drive the angst of obsessive and ongoing sorrow:

Broken hearts that are never understood or healed can linger for a........

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