Dark Night of Marriage

Part of the messiness of emotional intimacy involves the inevitable impact of psychological regression. Psychological regression is the surfacing of a younger psychological age seeking our attention. Typically, we can make sense of this visit if we view this younger version of ourselves as seeking something that was originally unavailable. It could be understanding, love, attention, safety, or acceptance.

The return to a younger age is typically triggered by hearing a diminishing remark, a feeling of rejection, feeling dismissed or forgotten. An old authority voice rides along with what is heard currently. Hence, all the makings of regression are present. Of course, as someone six years old surfaces, the conversation will be laced with blame, accusation, threats, condemnation, and........

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