DARVO at Work: Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim and Offender |
DARVO stands for deny, attack, and reverse victim and offender, a common response to being held accountable.
DARVO makes observers doubt the person who raised the concern. It can also make that person doubt themselves.
Learning to recognize the pattern weakens its effect.
Sticking to the original question can counteract the effects of DARVO.
Simone had done everything right. She had led her department's most impactful projects, trained half the team, and been told twice that she was "next in line" for a senior manager role.
Then the promotion went to Mark. He had been with the company for about a year, created extra work for others by turning in slop, and, as nearly everyone knew, had been in a relationship with their boss, Jody, for the last 6 months.
Simone didn't accuse anyone of anything. She politely asked HR whether the promotion process had been reviewed for a conflict of interest. Before long, Simone was labeled "a troublemaker," and somehow Jody was a victim of "harassment about her private life."
How does the person who raised a legitimate concern end up as the problem, while the person who created the problem ends up as the victim?
DARVO: Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender
Jennifer Freyd (1997) coined the term DARVO— for Deny, Attack, and Reverse Victim and Offender—to describe how people often respond when confronted about wrongdoing. It was first studied in the context of domestic violence and abuse, but it occurs anywhere accountability is brought up, including the workplace.
The pattern has three moves:
Deny. "Nothing happened." "There is no conflict of interest." "Ridiculous."
Attack. Shift focus to the person who raised the question, their “tone,” motives, competence, or character.
Reverse Victim and Offender. Claim that you are the one being harmed by questioning, “witch hunt,” or jealousy.
DARVO can be deliberate and calculated,........