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Misbehavior is an expression of an overwhelmed brain.

Effective discipline involves teaching children about desired behaviors. Time-outs don't do that.

Children need to learn what to do, not what not to do.

In theory, time-outs make sense. The goal of a time-out is to remove a child from an environment where unwanted behavior has occurred. The new environment is free of toys and attention from others. The new environment is boring. It is calm and quiet and mimics the emotional state you would like your child to emulate. The goal of a time-out is to provide a child with an opportunity to self-regulate and then return to normal life and their previous environment. In practice, however, successful time-outs are much more challenging and frustrating, particularly with young or strong-willed children.

Imagine this familiar scene: Your preschooler steals the Play-Doh your older child was playing with. Your child knows that stealing toys from other children is a no-no. You announce, “Time-out!” and point toward the designated chair.

Your child refuses to go.

Eventually, you carry them to the time-out chair. They immediately get up and run away. You chase after them and physically put them in the chair. They run away again. Before long, your child's original behavior is forgotten because the two of you are locked in a power struggle over sitting in a chair.

Why Time-Outs Can Go Wrong

One of the biggest problems with time-outs is the parental expectation that children will be compliant with........

© Psychology Today