Nadine, a 32-year-old mother of two, had decided that she needed to leave her abusive relationship, for her own safety and that of her children. She thought that she could end the relationship amicably by telling her partner that she wanted to end the relationship. Instead, her partner's behavior got worse: He immediately started shouting accusations and making threats about what would happen if she tried to leave him. In a fit of anger, he became physically violent, pushing Nadine against a wall and threatening to harm her if she left. Terrified and feeling trapped, she stayed, thinking this was safer.

Nadine's story is common. In fact, it takes most victims an average of seven times to leave an abusive relationship.1 Leaving is often one of the most dangerous times for victims of intimate partner violence, as this is the time when the abusive partner feels they are losing control. Many victims report that their partner’s behavior escalated in the days or weeks leading up to or following their departure, and statistics show that the risk of serious harm or fatality increases significantly when a victim decides to leave their abuser1,2. When possible, having a safety plan can help reduce the chance of violence1.

Leaving an abusive relationship can be challenging to plan for, especially since the abuse may escalate and a victim may need to leave suddenly. Like Nadine, many victims think that having a calm, rational conversation might work, only to experience increased abuse or violence as the abusive person becomes enraged. I remember thinking this same thing. This is why having a basic plan, even if it consists of just a few key elements, can........

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