“You always wanted to have a wife without the challenges of actually dealing with anything real.”

These words, from the 2013 movie "Her," were said by Catherine (Rooney Mara) to her soon-to-be-ex-husband Theodore (Joaquin Phoenix) when she finds out he is dating his computer's operating system (OS). After watching "Her," an eerily realistic glimpse into future relationships, I remember thinking, “This is intriguing, but a bit scary—thank God it’s not real...yet.”

A decade later, here we are. While our current moment may not be identical to the film, it’s worth asking how far off from it we truly are. And Catherine’s comment to Theodore seems to hit on something fundamental about human connection.

In an age of hyperconnectivity, new questions about relationships are emerging. Does tech support connection, or subtly erode it?

In a 2018 study by Dwyer et al., 300 participants dined with family or friends and were randomly assigned to keep their phones on the table or put them away. Those with phones present reported more distraction and less enjoyment of the interaction.

This finding begs the question: Why the constant impulse to jump on our devices? Is it ease and accessibility, a sense of safety, loneliness, stimulation, lack of mindfulness, or a quiet avoidance of true connection?

While the online world is central to our lives, mental health professionals warn that without mindful use—considering why, when, and how often we spend time online—we risk serious harm to our well-being and social connections. The rise of chatbots may be particularly indicative of the challenges we face.

According to a survey by Harmony Healthcare IT (2025), “Americans spend an average of 5 hours and 16 minutes per day on their phone, a 14 percent increase from the previous year."

With content so easily accessible, it’s no wonder we reach for our phones for instant gratification. Once mere information tools, Alexa and Siri now entertain, shop, and wake us—acting like digital valets or companions. Chatbots take this further: According to Botpress, they’ve surged in use for their “low cost, 24/7 availability, and scalability, with about 80 percent of people engaging with one in the past........

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