Just because you've been given a role doesn't mean that role is healthy, fair, or what defines you.

Feeling guilt or shame after making a healthy decision may mean that you need stronger boundaries.

Have compassion for yourself when you set a boundary.

You are not and never will be perfect. You can't make everyone happy all of the time. These truths may be uncomfortable, but hopefully, also freeing.

Navigating Expectations

Humans live in layers of systems (e.g., family, friends, colleagues, local community, country), and being part of those systems comes with expectations. Those expectations are normal and part of what helps us work together in teams. For example, expecting each member of the team to contribute or to follow certain rules, like driving on the correct side of the road for their current location.

Nevertheless, it can be hard to know how to create healthy boundaries around expectations that others have placed on you that are outside of the functional, agreed-upon norms and/or are not healthy for you. People in your life, often family, friends, or colleagues, may place expectations on you that do not align with how you feel, what you believe, or what feels healthiest for you.

For instance, as the eldest daughter, you may have been expected to care for your younger siblings, and........

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