Let’s be real: We all have patterns in relationships. For some of us, it’s the tendency to attract emotionally unavailable partners. For others, it’s jumping into relationships too fast or staying too long in something that’s not right. These patterns can feel like they have a grip on us, repeating over and over, leaving us feeling frustrated and stuck.

As a therapist, I’ve seen these cycles play out in countless clients—and I’ve been caught in them myself. I know what it’s like to repeat the same mistakes, hoping for a different outcome. But here’s the truth: You can’t break a pattern without first understanding it. And most of us have been running on autopilot, not even aware of the deeper issues driving our behavior.

In Single on Purpose, I talk about the importance of exploring our patterns and breaking these cycles. If you don’t address the root cause of your patterns, you’ll continue to attract the same kind of relationships, over and over. But if you’re ready to break free and create healthier, more fulfilling connections, it’s time to look inward.

Here’s how to start healing from toxic relationship patterns and break the cycle.

The first step to breaking a cycle is identifying what the pattern actually is. This requires getting brutally honest with yourself about your past........

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